Today is going to be an incredibly busy and crazy day--church, walk for diabetes, helping cook chili, a Halloween party. It is sure to be great, but ED is driving me crazy. He's trying to get me to plan my life to a T. I need to eat a ton of meals on the run today, and he is whispering in my ear to restrict in areas that I can control.
Yesterday, I had breakfast with a friend, lunch while babysitting, and dinner with a sweet boy. Could I control any of what I ate? Yes, I could. Did I? Yes, I did. Did I skip a snack accidentally? Yes, I did that, too.
At the end of the night, I was starving. My body was telling me that it needed more food than I gave it, but I didn't listen; I didn't know whether or not it was telling the truth. Often, ED sounds so loud and so convincing that I listen to his voice above my body's. So, I woke up this morning even hungrier than when I went to bed!
So, today is going to be a difficult day to control what I eat and when I eat. I hope that I can listen to my body's desires today and not ED's!
"This is the day the Lord has made! Let us rejoice and be glad in it!" Psalm 118:24
This day resignates with me as I am sure it does with so many others who have internal battles with the dreaded ED. How does one have a battle of wills with an unarmed person and yet that is exactly what we do...except with a part of ourselves that we cannot explain to others or sometimes even fully understand ourselves. Kudos to you for putting into words what so many can not, and for keeping ED at bay, though it is a constant struggle full of battles, you are winning the WAR!!!!
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